Nayonaise is an egg-free, soy-based sandwich spread meant to mimick the desirable qualities of its distant cousin and namesake, mayonnaise. Twitter user @dry_hump uses simile to explain his detest for this product by comparing its flavor to that of the matted, unwashed hair of feminist-icon and grammy-award-winning musician Ani DiFranco.
@dry_hump continues the simile by further insulting lesser eaten foods like an expensive Eastern-European cereal puree over salad, to which he applies Ani DiFranco’s dreadlock juice. It is unclear whether he actually enjoys eating such foods and was somehow put off by the simple addition of nayonaise, or if he just doesn’t understand how to craft a proper joke.
He is so utterly turned off by these foods that he wishes he could reap financial reward from the anguish of his mastication and the perceived inequitable exchange of his $14.
